Flags, fires and stick thin presidents.

If I were in charge of making US flags I would make them out of flameproof material in the hope that would stop people in foreign countries burning them in the streets. Another option might be for the US to dump a few states. Or make some states share stars. That would cut down on the size of the flag. Folllowing that line of thnking the other rule I would introduce is that
the American people can only elect US presidents that are really really skinny. Like super model skinny. That way, when the flag burners go to the next level and build effigys of the US president to burn in the street they would end up with really small ones that burn so fast no one had time to film them. That way the American people wouldn't have to go through the torment of seeing a likeness of their elected leader burning.
Sure the effigy builders could make their models a little bigger, but when they carried it out into the street everyone would say ‘Who’s that meant to be?’
‘It is the President of USA.’ answers the proud guy who was voted most likely to end up, as a professional effigy builder at his primary school.
‘But it doesn’t look anything like him.’
That is like the ultimate insult you can give to a professionl effigy builder. And it would probably be enough tp put him off the business for good. It would be like meeting a person that owns one of the rehab centres that Lindsay Lohan has used ( and there are a few now) and saying ‘Oh, you looked after Lindsay. You must do good work.’
Flame proof flags and skinny presidents. These two things could really help the US with their image overseas. Of course the other option would be for America to stop using the bullshit pretence of ‘Bringing freedom to the world’ as an excuse to interfere with other nations business.

Might be time to make a bulk order of that flame proof material and get all the presidential hopefuls on the grapefruit diet. Or maybe they could all start living on a diet of vodka and cocaine. That keeps Lindsay pretty slim.