How to make new old. A woman’s quarantine magic

This is how it works. Your missus goes out and buys a ‘how much did that cost?’ item. One of those dinnertime conversation stoppers, like a new pair of shoes, or a handbag. She brings it home and spirits it away to the special quarantine area, which normally seems to be somewhere dark and out of the way, that the man in her life doesn’t go, like the bottom of the wardrobe on her side under some old boxes.
The quarantine period depends on the cost of the item. In my house it seems to work out roughly about $100 a week. So, 3 weeks later Kirsty walks into the lounge wearing her $300 and something dollar pair of shoes.
Naturally my highly trained man sensors, immediately detect the new credit card draining purchase. ‘When did you get those?’ I ask.
‘These? Oh, I’ve had them for aaaages.’
And, thanks to the quarantine period, she’s right.



Update - ~Kirsty just told me it is more like $1000 a week, not $100
Ahhhhhhh

Small pox / small cocks.

Polio, Leprosy, small pox, these are some of the dirty little diseases people have worked towards stamping out. Eradicating them from the planet entirely. Well I propose we add small cocks to the list. If the spam I get is anything to go by then there are hundreds of thousands of people out there prepared to help you increase the size of your schlong. This could be because of the crappy spam filter that Yahoo Xtra supply me with, but I am guessing most of you get a few of these emails right?
So we know the technology is there and we know there is lots of it. So there is no reason we cant cure every small cock right now. Today… well by next week anyway. Small peckers would be a thing of the past. Banished to the annals of history… (is annals the right word?)
I would even go so far as to say that if you gave a guy who had small pox or leprosy and a small cock and the option of a cure for one, he would go for wonder willy treatment over a solution for the scabs and coughing blood.
Lets work together to rid the world of small cocks. Lets set a realistic date of 2010 to get rid of the last tiny todger. But it is going to require all of us pulling together. Next time you get spam about penis size, don’t delete it. Forward it to someone who can use the info. I am going to contact Bono about putting on a concert to raise money to set up a mobile penis enlargement surgery unit that will travel the world adding girth and length to those people in places that don’t have access to email spam. Remember Live 8? I am proposing Live 18 inches. Details coming soon.