Plasma penis

It’s all about the inches isn’t it? For penises and TV’s.
We just went up to a 42 at home and I have to say the wife and I are both loving the extra width.
It’s funny when you think about it. With electronics it is all about making things smaller. Ipods, cameras, phones. Except for tv’s. When it comes to them, bigger is better. More inches. Sure, the side profile is shrinking faster than George W’s credibility, but the screens are blowin up!
I guess technology means tv’s will keep getting bigger and bigger. Like the hole in the ozone. Or the gap between rich and poor.
When it comes to penises it is a different story. At some point the penises enlargement regulatory body has to say enough! If they don’t, someone is going to get hurt.
I get a lot of spam about penis enlargements ‘add extra inches’ etc, and I was thinking this is something the TV industry should look into. The concept of adding extra inches to your existing screen is a cool idea. Don’t know how they would do it, but I bet there is a scientist in korea who knows.
If I got spam about that, I’d click the button to find out more.
Those are inches I can use.

Big Penis Problems

I get like an email a week from my mum saying hi, but I get 30 asking if I want a bigger Penis. I don’t. I have never really thought it was a Problem but can 25 million sPam messages be wrong? Maybe I should get it enlarged, or engorged or lengthened or whatever it is they do to it.
If I did, if I have a few more inches wacked on, I wonder if the sperm spam would stop? If someone with a really large Penis had it made bigger wouldn’t that be dangerous? I wonder if the Society of Penis Enlargment ExPerts has a code of conduct. Some kind of database where customers can be listed so they stoP receiving the spam. Infact, that could be a good angle for the Penis enlargement spammers. ‘Get your Penis enlarged and we will stop spamming ya. Mind you, if there was a database of blokes who had had the treatment we’d all be on there sneaking a Peak wouldn’t we…. ‘Oh look at that Paul had a couple of inches. He needed it.’
If you’re wondering about the capital P’s in this entry it is because my P key on me keyboard is broken so I copied a P and am just Pasting it in as a type, should have used a lower case P I guess but didn’t realise till I was half way through this. I tell ya, not having a P key is a Pain in the arse. Its not till you don’t have it that you realise how often you use the letter P. Should have saved this blog about Penises till after my keyboard was fixed I guess

Small pox / small cocks.

Polio, Leprosy, small pox, these are some of the dirty little diseases people have worked towards stamping out. Eradicating them from the planet entirely. Well I propose we add small cocks to the list. If the spam I get is anything to go by then there are hundreds of thousands of people out there prepared to help you increase the size of your schlong. This could be because of the crappy spam filter that Yahoo Xtra supply me with, but I am guessing most of you get a few of these emails right?
So we know the technology is there and we know there is lots of it. So there is no reason we cant cure every small cock right now. Today… well by next week anyway. Small peckers would be a thing of the past. Banished to the annals of history… (is annals the right word?)
I would even go so far as to say that if you gave a guy who had small pox or leprosy and a small cock and the option of a cure for one, he would go for wonder willy treatment over a solution for the scabs and coughing blood.
Lets work together to rid the world of small cocks. Lets set a realistic date of 2010 to get rid of the last tiny todger. But it is going to require all of us pulling together. Next time you get spam about penis size, don’t delete it. Forward it to someone who can use the info. I am going to contact Bono about putting on a concert to raise money to set up a mobile penis enlargement surgery unit that will travel the world adding girth and length to those people in places that don’t have access to email spam. Remember Live 8? I am proposing Live 18 inches. Details coming soon.

You’ve got cock

Before the internet, email and spam, how did men find out about how to make their dicks bigger? We truly live in a magical age.
I'l tell you another incredible thing about the internet. Because I have written the words penis enlargement as one of the labels for this post, people searching 'penis enlargement' on the net will have this blog entry turn up as one of the results. If you are one of those men and are reading this, my question is why are you looking it up on the net? Don't you get 5 or 6 emails a week giving you all the details about how to get a more pronounced pecker? It's like Nigerian scam letters. They find you. These have to be two of the most popular spam emails in cyber space. Some smart spam scammer should combine them to create the ultimate bullshit story.

Dear Sir I am writing this with deep regard for your honorableness. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Matheiko Twathanass. Last year my husband died on a plane crash in Sth Africaa (news link attached). All they recovered form the charred wreckage of the plane was his huge 21 inch schlong for which he was famous in our village.
I have been left to care for my 8 children, but with no funds for my good self I have been forced to sell my husbands super sized man handle. It is currently being held in a chilled vault in Switzerland. All I ask is your help gaining access to what is rightfully mine and in return I will be happy to share a good portion of the length with you.