BAD TOUCHING

I saw on the news that they are putting out adult content in braille. Guess it doesn’t matter if masturbating makes you go blind now. I wonder if the stories could be ribbed for extra pleasure.
If Braille readers want to have safe sex reading maybe they will have to wear latex gloves.
I wonder if the word G spot will be a G or just a spot. Maybe you could have a big bump with a tiny bump on top of it, and that could be a boob.
Mind you, in a braille porno mag a blind person would have to watch out for the staples in the centre fold.
Porn Braille – for people who like to do it with the lights off.

Mia’s Meat Pillow.

So my sister just had a baby yesterday. Her first. 6 pounds. Why do they always refer to babies weight in pounds? Is it because if you made it kilograms it would remind you of vegetables? '2.72 kilograms of onion thanks.'
Saw a pic of Mia Rose. Cute as a button, in that new born baby way. All babies look like grumpy old men when they are born. Fair enough too. About being grumpy. I mean all your life has been like one long free flotation tank session. Warm dark and wet. Suddenly you are pushed out through a door that is WAY to small, into a cold brightly lit room. It’s traumatic. And that’s just the start. Then you get boob shoved in your face. What the F! You’ve never seen one of these before. You have no idea what you’re meant to do. It’s like being smothered with a meat pillow. No wonder newborn babies cry and look so pissed off. They just want to go back. Welcome to the planet Mia, hope you enjoy your stay. Sorry it’s a bit of a mess.