Rugby World Cup dribble

Just watched a Titanic struggle between the All Blacks and Romania. When I say Titanic what I mean is, like the film, everyone already knew the ending before it started.
You’re familiar with Beatle mania in the 60’s? Well along time before that there was Romania. People all over Europe were so hot for anything and everything Roman that they decided to name a country after it.

Romania filled the spot in the 2007 World Cup line up reserved for countries whose name ends in ‘ia’. Personally I would have like to see Transylvania get in. At halftime the whole team would pile off into the blood bin. For a drink…. Get it…. A drink……
Oh never mind.

If you’re not from New Zealand you probably cant grasp just how important the rugby world cup, and us winning it, is to little old New Zealand. Being a small island at the bottom of the planet we get very excited about anything that gets us attention from the big grown up country’s of the world. Rotary milking, man’s first flight, splitting of the atom, Rachel Hunter and big expensive racing yachts. We’ve tried a lot of different things. But the one that seems to work most consistently for us, is rugby.

The make up of the AB’s has changed over the years. Back in the day there were a lot of farmers in the team. These days there are a lot more city boys. But, just like the Sth African rugby union insists there are a number of black players in the national team, the All Blacks have to have at least one farmer in every starting 15. It’s a law. And at least 2 guitar players per touring squad.

There’s no doubt the All Blacks are getting bigger. The victorious 87 World Champs would look like ball boys along side the 2007 team. If they keep growing at this rate the All Blacks wont be able to fly in normal aircraft seats in 20 years time. New Zealand scientists are busy designing a special plane to carry the national squad. It is either that or they go on a cruise ship.

It’s all about the money these days in rugby. Big money. Sure a top All Black earns a year, what David Beckham earns in a week, but it is still big money down in New Zealand. Players will be looking for ways to make extra advertising bucks on the field and maybe some of them have already started. Take Jerry Collins. With his bright white flat top and black everything else, he looks like a pint of Guinness with legs. Smart move by the makers of Guinness. ‘Good things take time. Except a move by Jerry Collins.’

So the pool games are nearly over. Surprisingly, Georgia, Namibia and Timbucktoo didn’t deliver the performances their pre tournament form suggested……. But now we get to the sharp end of the competition ( I think I stole that line from Simon Fuller on American Idol). Maybe the AB’s will finally get a decent game and maybe they can hold it together and bring home the little silver cup. Or will we live up to our reputation as the best rugby team in the world. In between world cups. There’s a lot riding on this for us and if it doesn’t come off we might have to give Rachel Hunter a make over and marry her off to another ageing rocker.

Rugby World Cup 2007. Packing down with the future.

The world’s third most popular sporting event has rolled round again and the pressure is on for the famous All Blacks to bring home the silverware. They are without a doubt the best rugby team in the world between world cups. We just need to get thew timing right.
Being a tiny little island at the bottom of the world we place great importance on anything that gets us attention. The Americas Cup and Hobbits have worked for us from time to time, but rugby has been our main source of pride. Things got off to a good start with our game against Italy. I was surprised the Italians didn’t try to swap sides and come out with the All Blacks at half time. But it wasn’t really the work out the men in black need and I worry that they aren’t really going to get a decent run in their pool matches. We play Portugal next and they aren’t even putting their top team on the field. I wonder if they have Port in their sipper bottles? They’ll need it. If we have to play Portugal B I reckon the AB’s should only field players who have a letter B in their first name. Or perhaps give the Portuguese a head start. Maybe 10 minutes on the field by themselves at the start of each half.
Good to see the Japanese back for another hiding but at least they are starting to field a team of biggish looking blokes. Speaking of the Japanese there is a story going round that last week in New Zealand they found a Japanese player left over from the 87 world cup squad. He had been stuck in a very isolated part of New Zealand near Hamilton and thought the tournament was still going on. I reckon the Japanese should give up hiring old All Blacks as coaches and get their top scientists to build a team of rugby playing robots with laser beam eyes and electro magnets they switch on for a real solid bind in the scrum and hydraulic springs in the forwards legs for the lineout and built in cameras that play footage back to the ref so he doesn’t have to go upstairs, and boots that are welded on so there are no delays in play with boots coming off or undone laces
That would be cool team and I imagine its fans would be a healthy mix of anti sport computer nerds and rugby heads. And at the end of the day is rugby all about bringing people together? That’s why its called union.