GpS love

I am spending time with another woman. But only in the car and my wife knows. In fact, the three of us hang out together sometimes. She ‘s a bit older than us. In her 40’s. But this is a lady who knows where she’s going.

‘In One point five kilometers turn left’
‘In One kilometer turn left’
‘In two hundred meters turn left’
‘Turn left.’

And if I don’t turn left? If I just keep going. Do I hear…..
‘I said LEFT you DICK HEAD. Why don’t you listen to me’

No I don’t.
Instead, there is a short pause and then, in a calm, relaxing voice, she says one word …..

‘Recalculating’.

It’s a great way to live. It’s changed my life. I am secretly hoping my wife picks up on the idea round the house.

‘Honey put out the rubbish in the next hour ’
‘Honey put out the rubbish in the next half hour ’
‘Honey put out the rubbish in the next fifteen minutes’
‘Honey put out the rubbish.’

`Recalculating………Honey put out the rubbish in the next two days.’


Maybe when she is fully used to life with GpS, I can use the style when I am at the pub and have to text her.

‘Hi babe, at the pub home in one hour
‘Hi babe, at the pub home in half an hour
‘Hi babe, at the pub home in fifteen minutes
Recalculating…….
‘Hi babe, at the pub home in one hour

I love my GpS and I am committed to it, but I couldn’t help noticing when I went of ride in a friends BMW X5 the other day that his GpS lady sounds younger and sexier than mine. I think it might be my GpS ladies hotter younger sister.
I bought mine off the shelf, his came installed. Maybe that’s why. It did get me thinking about the fact that there might be something better out there. I’m not saying I am going to cheat on my GpS, but the fact is, men are shallow like that and the GpS makers know it.