Bendy straw bollocks

The way I see it the bendy straw was a complete waste of time. You can’t get anything out of a glass with a bendy straw that you can’t get with a normal straw. And do those few centimeters of bendiness really make it easier for you to get your lips around it?
When alien life forms come to post apocalyptic earth and start looking at all the stuff we have invented the few remaining survivors of the human race are in for some major embarrassment when the aliens question them about the bendy straw.
‘What is this?’
‘It’s a bendy straw’
‘How is this different to the normal straw?’
‘It’s bends near the top.’
‘Why?’
‘So you can……. Bend it.’
‘Why?’
‘….Ummm…. Hey have you seen these. They’re called post it notes. These are really useful.’
The aliens would totally get it if it were a bendy anal probe. You need something bendy if it is going up the poop canal. But a straw? I doubt they will say anything to our faces. But when they go back to their home planet, they are going to get a lot of intergalactic laughs telling their mates about how the earthlings wasted time and money inventing bendy straws.
There is an ad for Shell oil on the box at the moment. One more of those big budget hand jobs the oil companies put on, to try and convince you they aren’t running round raping the planet and ripping off the locals. So this Dutch guy watches his son finish a drink with a bendy straw and gets an idea for a drill the goes down AND across. Which the bendy straw would have done if it were upside down. But it wasn’t. Why? Cause while that might be useful for sucking oil out of the ground, you don’t need to do it to finish a chocolate milkshake.
Just think what the inventor of the bendy straw could have put his creative energy, time and effort into instead of the stupid straw. He might have invented cornflakes that don’t go soggy in milk. A music video concept for Shakira that doesn’t involve her dancing like a stripper for 3 and a half minutes. Or a better ending for the Matrix films. I don’t know who invented the bendy straw. Maybe they went onto bigger and better things. Maybe the bendy straw was the inspiration for the bendy bus. I hope so, because the bottom line is the Bendy Straw sucks.