School sports day me hearties.

The wife told me it is our daughters school sports day tomorrow. Then she said it was also Pirate day. What a cool idea. Every school does sports day. How many do Pirate Sports day? There could be a competition to dig a hole to bury a chest. A running race where you have to keep the parrot on your shoulder. Walk the plank and get points of for the way you jump off. A wooden leg race instead of a three-legged race. The winner could get pieces of eight instead of medals and then we could all drink rum. My wife said the rum was a bad idea because the kids would be too drunk to do their lessons in the afternoon. She rang me later to say it is pirate day next week so sports day tomorrow will be the same old same old. Pity, I was ready me hearties!

Tomorrow’s pirates

Back in the day pirates struck fear into the hearts of sea travelers across the globe. Black Beard, Long John Silver. These were scary men. But they must be turning in their unmarked deserted island graves now when they see what has become of their bloodthirsty terrifying tradition. I wonder how Black Bart would have reacted if someone had told him that by the 20th century dressing as pirates would be a favourite for 4 year old boys celebrating their birthdays. Rather than the wind blowing across the deck of the cake it is the blowing out of candles that happens now. Yo ho ho and another plastic cup of lemonade for little jimmy then out to the sandpit to dig for buried treasure.

300 hundred years ago it would have probably been considered in bad for a kid to have a pirate party. I wonder how little Johnny will celebrate turning 5 300 years from now? Nautical themes will always be popular, so maybe Japanese whaler birthday parties will be the big thing. Dad could turn the garage into the deck of a Japanese whaler and pour fake blood all over the floor and after a glass of non alcoholic sake the kids could play pin the harpoon on the humpback.